SHOW TALK

Aug 5 - The Luggage Store

I sucked. It's not like no one laughed at the funny stuff, they did. It's just that the funny stuff was far and few between. I just wasn't prepared. I need to get more disciplined about preperation. I need to sit down for an hour or so the day before and plan what I'm going to say, and how I'm going to say it. (And how long does it take to say it?) The inner-city games bit bombed. I think it's too mean for me. It makes me uncomfortable. In this bit I joke about what sports are included in the inner city games. Sports like 200 meter dumpster diving, and freestyle car-jacking. I did some jokes about planning a wedding. It got some good laughes, but the bit needs a re-write. I added some new jokes about Mike Tyson to my boxing routine and they worked very well.
 

On my way home from the show, the bus I was riding got into an accident. The bus driver went through a red light, and a kid on a skateboard hit the bus, and the rear wheels ran over his legs. The kid was laying in the street like a bugs bunny cartoon with his legs flattened where the wheel rolled over him. I was so freaked out that I just walked away.
 

Later on another bus, this homeless guy was telling his stoned friends how he and his cronies were going to declare sovereignty for the Presidio. That way the "boys in blue" couldn't touch them. Cause if the police came in there the residents would arrest them and throw them in jail. (The old military police holding cells.) And if the police wouldn't let the "The Citizens of Earth" arrest them, they could just get INTERPOL to do it for them. The next morning I'm on a different route and here is this guy again. He is on his way to the HALL OF JUSTICE to file sovereignty papers. I would love to have seen that scene.
 

Aug 8 - One World Cafe

I did much more preperation for this show. I've decide to work through some of my old material and see if it's still funny. I started with the "Stranger in the night" and got blank stares. After that the bit got rolling pretty good. Added some more detail to the Abbott and Costello segment. Using "spanking the monkey" got a big laugh. "I got to go to therapy" closer worked well. The Brendan routine did better than ever, but still not what I expected. I think I need to slow down on this one too. No one got run over tonight.
 

After the show someone commented that he liked the imagery of the Brendan bit. Perhaps I need to stop pursuing the big laugh. Maybe I'm entertaining even if they aren't spewing laughter. Next show I'm going to watch people closer. If they are all smiling and paying attention, maybe that's all I really need. (But those big laughs feel so good!)
 

Aug 10 - Writing Session

I think I found a longer bit for the Una-Comic character. I'm going with the smarmy lounge comic delivery, and he does borscht belt type jokes about computer geeks. One joke starts, "two geeks go into a bar...", another starts "Three geeks die and go to heaven, a unix geek, a pc geek, and a Mac geek..." Pat suggested a bit about Bill Gates biting into Apple. I'm going to have to start giving her co-writer credits.
 

Aug 12 - Dooley's Pub

Again, I didn't pepare enough. I was tired and wound up doing the same outine from the One World. The crowd was hostile. This was the first Tuesday night comedy show, and they weren't too happy about it. The singing got their attention though, and I managed to keep it. Not much laughter, but they did listen to me. Next week at Dooley's I'm doing the wrestling routine.
 

Aug 13 - Writing Session

OK, it's time to let go of the routines that just aren't funny. Or I guess aren't funny enough. They're all funny to me, but why waste time and energy wringing a laugh out of this old material, when I can write new material that is much funnier. At first I thought it was just that I was tired of the old material, having heard it so much, but I realise now that I have gotten much better at writing material. Do I have an ego or what?
 

You need an ego though. I recently got email from a 17 year old high school student telling me he was the funniest comedian ever, and was asking for help finding an agent. This guy has never been on stage, and the jokes he sent me were terrible. But he's going to make it. He has the attitude that will take him places. If he survives the intial year(s) of bombing and development.
 

Aug 14 - Writing Session

OK, so I didn't write anything. I just watched Tom Waits on Bravo. Good stuff. I was just too tired to write. I'm letting my day job get me down. I need to just let it go. Concentrate on what's important to me. So I go to the One World tomorrow not fully prepared. I'm going to take lunch hour at work to polish and tie together the una-comic routine. Hopefully the bit will be funny enough to pull through the rough spots.
 

Aug 15 - One World Cafe

Once again I went right over people's heads. Throwing too many concepts at people at once. I think that computer geeks will find the routine funny, but a general audience doesn't have any frame of reference for it. The una-comic idea works as few short lines, but not as an expanded bit.
 

Tonight we had some hecklers. These three pre-teen kids came in on skateboards. They were having a good time, but kind of obnoxious. Most of the comics worked off them really well. I used them in a few places, doing the lounge comic type approach and got a few good laughs. Joe's whole set was just playing off these kids. He is the best at working a crowd I have ever seen. Another comic had a tougher time. Most comics get up on the stage, but some stand on the floor next to the stage. When you do that you lose some of your stage control. This one comic, who can be very funny, but is too tied to his "set" routine, lost it when the kids interupted him. He became hostile and the kids became hostile back at him. Ugliness ensued.
 

Aug 16 - Club Car Showcase

I didn't get to perform, but it was a very funny show. It's nice to just sit and watch comedy once in a while. The audience was a little sparce, and if Chad's friends weren't there it would have just been comedians. We need to get better at promoting these shows. To this end, starting next month, the show will include non-comedians, to attract a wider audience. This is what alot of comedy clubs did in the early 90's. They were losing audience and figured it was comedy that was going bad on them. When in reality it was the clubs that went bad on comedy. The open mikes rely entirely on word-of- mouth to get people to shows. The few non-comedians who do come are usually just customers of the bar or coffee house, who just happened to be there at the right time. We need to do more to promote the shows and ourselves.
 

Aug 17 - SF Comedy Day

A big concert in the park that I only found out about on Friday. The event was sponsored by the newspaper that I don't read, so I didn't hear about it. I guess I need to start picking up both papers at least a few days a week. The show was kind of bland, but that should be expected for a big outdoor crowd. Will Durst was funny. Jonny Steele came on and announced that he just got a DJ gig on a local FM station. He won the SF Comedy Competition last year. This does not bode well. Maybe he doesn't like touring. Maybe club owners don't think he's funny. I left during Steele's set. What struck me most was that the pofessional comedians were no funnier than the open mikers, just more polished. And in some cases too polished.
 

Aug 18 - The Headshot Saga

OK, so I had a headshot done back in Iowa. The picture turned out great. I got some 8x10 glossies done by the photographer. I figured I would just get mass copies made when I got out here, which is what I tried to do this week. Only it turns out that on the picture, in little tiny letters it says "copyright [the photographers name]", so the company won't copy them without a realease from the photographer. So I ran home and checked my receipt and sure enough, I signed over copyright to the photographer. I feel like an idiot. The woman at the printing place says that some photographers do this so you can only get reproductions done through them, but some others sell pictures to advertisers and such. I feel like an idiot. I called the photographer and asked her answering machine for a release. We'll see what happens next. BE CAREFUL WHAT YOU SIGN!
 

AUG 19 - The Luggage Store

Had a good show. My routine was just a jumble of ideas, but I was up for it. I had good energy, and I conected well with the audience. Before I went up Tony mentioned Flip Wilson, and I this great joke popped in my head. I tried it and it went over big. I'm starting to think on my feet again. The computer geek jokes flopped. The out of tune boom box joke went well, but I forgot to do the Tom Waits reference. The alkyhol patch joke got a good laugh, with appropriate boos for the six-patch line. The bus crazies joke was kind of flat. There's just too many people who do bus crazies jokes. The aqua velva joke worked though. I forgot to do TRANSIT MAN. The bail interview routine was too heavy, but I think if I lighten it up and add more goofy criminals it could be a funny bit. The knives joke is just too scary. The Nike joke didn't work because I mentioned that Pat had no cartaledge in one knee, and freaked people.
 

AUG 22 - Open Mike Live

Boy, did this suck. I had forgotten, or perhaps never fully realised how much I disliked doing open mike tv shows. This isn't to slam public access or even the shows themselves, it just doesn't work for standup. Not having an audience sucks. The crew and other performers are too busy with their own thing to really listen. And the other thing is, the jokes just aren't working. I'm trying too hard and analysing things too much.
 

AUG 23 - REYES of Laughter comedy competition

It went pretty much as expected. A hint of things to come, only 6 comedians entered. There were several things about the format I disliked. The order was taken roughly from the order we arrived. Yes I got to go first. WEE! Malcolm did nothing to warm up the crowd, so I had to start cold. The set went well though. It convinced me even more that I need to move away from these little jokes I've been doing. They aren't my best work. So the audience was pretty sparce at first, but later several friends of one of the comedians came in. The winner was picked by audience applause at the end. The comedian with the most people there won. By the way I tied for 5th. Oh yeah, there was no promotion for this event.
 

If I do the punchline tomorrow, I'm going to do the basketball story. It's a fun routine to tell. Tuesday at the luggage store I'm going to try the Bif and Mel story. If I do dooley's I'm going to do The Ugly American. I'm just going to the bits that I would like if I were the audience.
 

Have you noticed that I contradict myself from one journal entry to the next? Well, I change my mind. I don't know what I'm doing here. I'm just making it up as I go along. So just assume that the most recent entry is the most correct.
 

AUG 24 - Punchline Showcase

No I didn't perform but I just thought I'd mention it because it was a really good show. Lot's of funny people. I love sitting around BS'ing with the other comedians.
 

So I'm getting excited about the Bif and Mel routine. I have no idea how people will react to it, but I'm going to have a ball. The bit is extracted from a series of short-short stories I wrote years ago around a central theme of this timeless near-future sort of guy who hangs out in a bar and types out his thoughts. For a long time I've wanted to put it all together in a one-man show. I'm going to use the Luggage Store workshop as the launchpad. I'll use the other shows to do standup type material.
 

AUG 26 - Luggage Store

OK, I didn't do the Bif and Mel routine. Tony introduced me, and the bit went right out of my head. Not that I forgot it, it was just at that instant that I realised that then wasn't the right time to do this routine. I wasn't in character. I need to dress that part and be there in the moment as the narrator as a character. Not just me telling the story. I have to play the part. I need to commit. This harkens back to my lack of preparation problem. I've gotten good enough that I can slack off a bit and the audience doesn't seem to notice. The thing is though, they do notice. So on Friday I'll be at One World Cafe. I'll be dressed for the part. I'll have a new haircut. I'll be in the moment. (At least that's the plan.)
 

AUG 27 - The SF Fringe Festival flyer

This is cool. September 4-14 here in San Francisco is something called The Fringe Festival. Much many comedy. There is also drama, and dance, and stuff like that, but who cares. Much many comedy. This would be a great place to do Tales From The Diner. It would also be a great place to do an alternative comedy showcase. Like the best of the unknown comedians.
 

AUG 28 - Writing Session

The Idea was to look through my old material and throw away what wasn't funny. Only it's all funny. At least to me it is. I put the majority of my stuff in a "not funny enough" folder. Yes, I have a joke file. I write out all my routines on the computer, and save everything I write. The problem is that everything in the world is funny to me. So when I say something like, "I met this guy who on the bus who was on his way to the courthouse to fill out sovereignty papers for the Presidio," and no one laughs, I get confused. The idea alone is enough for me. What I have to do is learn to show the audience how funny that is.
 

You know what? That's wrong. Or maybe it's wrong. I don't know. Is it my job as a comedian to make people understand the craziness, or should I just tell them how I see the world, and let them decide whether its funny or not? I guess I'm talking about self expression vs. entertainment. On one hand we have people like Brother Theodore, who is hilarious to me, but inaccesable to a general audience. On the other hand is Jim Carrey, who many people find hysterical, but seems to me just to make funny faces. Does formalism deny the audience?
 

I love it when I answer my own questions. As you read the paragraph above you noticed my emphasis on how funny I think Brother Theodore is. Not that I'm saying that people shouldn't like Jim Carrey. If he makes you laugh, that's a wonderful thing. So it appears that my self-expression is more important to me than mugging it up for the big laugh. The routine I'm doing tomorrow night fits then. I guess sub-consciously I already knew this. Actually story is a better word than routine. I hope they like it.
 

AUG 29 - One World Cafe

Bif and Mel got the response I wanted. I was dressed the part, and getting in character was no problem. Mostly because the character is a large part of me. The "jokes" got good laughs, and one person actually laughed at my Fledspar/cleveage joke. The rest of the time people were listening carefully. This is not a comedy club type routine.
 

AUG 30 - Java Source

Just a bit before the show, the host called and said he couldn't make it. So after some fudging I volunteered to be host for the night. I had planned to do my wrestler bit, but figured it wouldn't work if I just went up there and started yelling at the audience. So I went up without the mask on, and then after introducing myself, I put the mask on and started the bit. It bombed! I just couldn't get into character. As soon as I took the mask off and was back in host mode people started laughing again. The rest of the night went well. We had five other acts, and they were all funny. I did a pretty good job of keeping the show moving. One or two quick jokes after each act then introduce the next one. I worked hard to have something relevant to say for each act. It felt like it worked well.
 

AUG 31 - Punchline

No I didn't perform. It was an OK show with many of the same people from the week before, doing mostly the same material. I joked a bit with the booker. Either I helped my chances of getting up next month, or I hurt them. Hey you have to try. On one hand, he is more likley to remember me, on the other, maybe he didn't like the joke. We'll see what the circumstances are. Like I said, I'm just making this up as I go along. Also got the chance to make some other contacts that may help me in the near future.