Alternate definitions and commentary on real words.

platonic

The favorite soda of cartographers

sadist

A person who intentionally makes themselves sad. As in - He must have beed a sadist because he liked reading Kathleen Spivack's poetry.

astroturf

The area defended by teen-aged space gangs.

disapprobation

disapproval - as in: Jane Austen showed disapprobation at the Calvinists' misappropriation of the work reprobation, though she originally thought it was a good idea.

pedagog

Someone who is very excited, or agog, over teaching their boss's children to walk, but probably not how to spell.

intersect

A group of people who come together to worship the internet.

intellectual

A person who gives speaches about a certail computer chip maker.

paranutritional

The new politicaly correct word for junk food. That isn't a joke. It seems that telling kids that they're eating junk food is "demeaning." Sometimes I think the English language needs an enema.

hippocampus

A place where hippos go to learn, drink too much and lose their inhibitions

somnambulance

A truck with flashing lights that goes around picking up sleep walkers.

dentalief

The relief of finally finding a dentist you like.

I just had two root canals done and outside of the three hours in the chair I had no pain or discomfort. This guy is good.

voidaphile

Someone who is obsessed with "The Void."

antiasynithisphobia

The fear of not being unusual.

Inspired by my 15 year old niece who is deathly afraid that she is running out of things to rebel against.

remarkable

something that can be marked up more than once

As in; That chalkboard is remarkable. I came up with this example to prove a point to a co-worker about a miscommunication on multiple meanings for every day words.

disunderstanding

verb: Actively not understanding something

Pretty much describes the activity of every on-air personality on the Fox News Channel.

narcoinsomnia

Dreaming that you can't sleep

I know it sounds odd but this actually happens to me from time to time.

egoplasty

surgically altering someone's ego

As in; I had to perform egoplasty on the arrogant bastard.

sporify

to make something into a spore

As in; Because of the incomplete manufacturing process Bill had to manually sporify the raw material.

Why is it the word of the week? Because it sounds cool. Say it slowly and menacingly. "Sporify" That's cool.

hyponormal

A lower than normal level of normality

Yes, I know that the definition is logically invalid. Anyway, the motive behind this word was some Fox News reactionary complaining about Barak Obama making up words. The funny part is that the word Obama used was a perfectly constructed word, in fact is was a rather clever use of prefixes and suffixes, but since it didn't appear in the news geek's dictionary he assumed that Obama made a gramatical error. What a maroon.

So I built my own simple word which appears in no dictionary I could find, but is still a perfectly cromulent word.